Below is a poem someone gave me after the death of my daughter. If I ever felt like I couldn’t cry, but I needed to let out the pain I was feeling, I would read this poem, it worked for me. I hear from a lot of dads that say they find it difficult to cry. Another thing I would do is sit down and write my children a letter. I would go into my home office, shut the door, sit down and just start writing. As soon as I would type the words “Dear Sweet Katie” or “Dear Sweet Noah” the tears would start to flow and would keep flowing until I was done writing the letter. This is just one idea incase you are having a difficult time crying. Anyone else have any ideas they would like to share?
Don’t Cry for Me Daddy
Don’t cry for me Daddy
I am right here
Although you can’t see me
I see your tears
I visit you often
Go to work with you each day
And when it’s time to close your eyes
On your pillow’s where I lay
I hold your hand and stroke your hair
And whisper in your ear
If you’re sad today Daddy
Remember I am here
God took me home
This we know is true
But you will always be my Daddy
Even though I’m not with you
I am Daddy’s little girl
We will never be apart
For every time you think of me
Please know I’m in your heart.
I love you Daddy!
Your Baby Girl
This poem really expresses a sweet thought I couldn’t otherwise say to myself. My wife and I lost our second baby to stillbirth yesterday. Our first was to miscarriage at 10 weeks, this time she was at 24 weeks old. My heart breaks for all those who have to go through this, thank yo for the poem.
Hi Joe. So sorry for your losses. They are painful and change you for ever. No one can understand unless they themselves experience it. We are here for you my friend.
Wishing you and your family peace as you navigate through this loss.
Kelly
Is it okay if I use the poem, too, in a collage I am preparing for my brother who recently lost his daughter? Thank you for sharing.
Absolutely. Use it!
Thank you for sharing this. My brother lost his only child two years ago today…I pray that this poem will offer some comfort.
Thankyou for posting this poem My daughter Zoe passed away five months ago 8 days shy her 13th birthday . This will be my first fathers day without her . It will be a tough one . I will remember this poem . I look for signs that she is with me . A few weeks ago I visited my daughter Zoe . My daughter is buried at the church beside our family farm . It was a Tuesday night my brother had just let the cattle and horses out to pasture . I sat on the hill beside Zoe when a saw a young robin at the bottom of the hill . The wind was blowing I remember the sun starting to set . Mother robin flew in to check on her young when the baby started to hop up the hill right onto my lap . I looked at it ….. It sat there for a while and then hopped across Zoe’s grave and then flew off into the bush . I cried happy tears I hope that was her . God I miss her !
Thankyou
Casey
May i have a copy of this poem? My son lost his baby girl of 5 months in Dec this past year, he is heart broken and it is perfect. Thank you!
Debbie – I am not the originator of this poem, so I don’t have the right to say yes you can copy it. However, I know many people use this poem to help other dads that have lost a child. Feel free to use it.
Kelly
Who says a scar doesn’t hurt more than a wound !!!!!!!!
Joe,
I just found this site about 10 minutes ago. My daughter passed away almost 2 months ago. She was 4 years old. She was diagnosed with epilepsy, but still lived a very happy life. She died unexpectedly in her sleep. I have been searching for ways to help my husband cope. He is not the type to talk about his emotions, and he is trying very hard to be strong for me. I just know he is dead inside. I feel as though I can never find the words to help him, because I am struggling myself. Your website is wonderful, and I hope it will help my husband to read your writings. I still dont quite know what to say, because I cant even sort my own feelings right now..but I am glad I found your page, I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers..as I know this is a very LONG healing process..and we will never actually ‘heal’. God bless
Megan
(Michigan)
I. Cried a lot when I read this poem its very hard to loose a child we lost our son two years ago and I think of him all the time just wondering what he would be doing if he would like hockey and other sports I miss him very much
Joe,
Thank you for your posting. I am sorry for the loss of your son. I ask those kind of questions regarding my daughter and son all of the time. Who would they be today? What would they look more like my wife or me? What would their personality be like? Lots of questions.
Joe – I wanted to also let you know that I moved this blog to http://www.GrievingDads.com. Please come visit us over at that site. I would love to have you apart or our conversations.
Peace.
Kelly
When I first read this poem, I was floored. I just knew it was a message from my daughter who passed a mere 3-1/2 months ago. I wasn’t able to look at it again until tonight, but I want you to know that I will be creating a poster of sorts that will hang in my wood shop to remind me that my baby girl is with me, forever and always.
John,
Embrace these messages that are sent to us. You never know when they show up, but it always seems to be at the right time. Thank you for sharing this, it made me smile.
Peace.
Kelly
I am honored to stand along my friend Kelly in the Farley-Kluger Amendment. yes..we are grieving dads, but we are grieving parents. yes, men handle grief differently, but we are grieving parents. I am blessed to be able to read all of your posts. Always speak, never hold back and welcome the love and support.
It brought tears to me just reading it. I lost my daughter in 2008 and there is not a day that goes by that I dont think of her. It is hard for men to deal with grief. We live in a world that promotes a false image of what a real man is and unfortunatley most of have feel for it. Thank God that when when my daughter died that I had a real chritian man in my life who showed me it was OK to grieve and cry for my duaghter.
Terry,
It will bring tears to your eyes for sure. I think about both of my children (2004 and 2006) everyday. I try to live my life in a way that I think they would be proud of. I too was fortuante enought to have another guy that helped me learn to grieve in a way that was constructive for me. I have read that you can not go around grief, over grief or under grief. You must go through it to heal.
Thanks for sharing.
Peace.
Kelly
Let the fact that our loved one’s have passed on to the next, be the inspiration to live our lives in truth, in true love, and in courage. We too, will pass one. Let’s arrive at that same Destination.
That is a beautiful poem. I am not a father, but writing letters to my son has been incredibly helpful to me. Just generally, I feel like writing out my thoughts and feelings is important to my journey with grief. My husband and I both wrote letters to our son to read at his memorial, and I was just amazed at everything that poured out of my husband. The words he spoke to our little Lewy were just so beautiful and heartfelt, and I think it really helped him to share them.
Lisa,
Thank you for sharing what has worked for you. I must admit, when I sat down to write a letter to my babies, I was surprised at how much emotion flowed from my body. It was great therapy for me and an excellent way to let my children know how much I love them and miss them.
Thanks again for sharing.
Peace.
Kelly